Tag Archives: sex

325 Sycamore Lane

Description: A short horror film based on the vanishing hitchhiker urban legend.
Starring Jeff DuJardin, Emmy Newman and Juliette James.

SB Thoughts:

:17 babe

:22 stop thinking about how much of a babe you are, Jeff, you almost hit some pajama’d lady

:47 “is this about to be sex now?” – jeff thoughts

1:06 why you gotta talk so weird tho?

1:16 “pffhaha HAVEN’T YOU EVER HEARD OF MAPQUEST??”

1:27 “I’m like totally dead”

1:42 incest

1:51 “ya, that’d because my body is dead, anyway –back to my hot brother”

2:05 “..so are you married to your brother, or..?”

2:21 “I’m remarkably British now, and fuck off, you bloody wanker”

2:48 “get it?..cuz I’m like totally 10 years dead”

3:16 confused and handsome for the camera

3:18 and dead to a trucker

trucker.png

pandarunover.gif

3:31 WHAT AN ASSHOLE!!

3:36 hey, you married son of a bitch, pay attention to the road for once, maybe.

3:44 “just calling to let you know I’m like totally dead, and have been this whole time. have a nice life with your wife you don’t love.”

3:56 THAT ASHTON’S AT IT AGAIN!!

punk'd

4:06 I guessed her exact death age. fucking professional.

4:36 PLOT TWIST

4:41 thems those, “I’m going to kill you and then have sex with your body” eyes

brolove.png

4:46 HE’S CONSIDERING IT THO

Lesson: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYKsjdkdRbw

Rating: 4 out of 5 stars ✩✩✩✩

Becky

Description: Steven invites Becky over for dinner on a first date after meeting her online. The events that occur are more than they bargained for.

Think Tinder…Gone Wrong!

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About Renderyard:

Renderyard is a Film Network for Filmmakers to watch new short films online, including an online film festival for independent shorts and documentaries around the world. Enter our Competitions by Joining for Free. Create a profile to show your Shorts online in HD and 300MB in size. Web site users can share videos and music to with the world on our platform. Join our Premium account to show feature length titles 2GB in size. Meet and talk to other creative people to create new short movies and animations. Renderyard Film Network is an international digital multimedia platform operating as an independent film festival and a free film and music distributor to provide award-winning filmmakers, musicians and visual artists with a platform onto which filmmakers can upload and screen their work as well as promote and sell it.

The Renderyard online multimedia platform contains a wide selection of films that include documentaries, animations, series, independent films and new music from all around the world. As a film resource, Renderyard provides a strong networking facility for emerging new talent and dedicates an important area to work in partnership and build creative collaborations with leading video search engines, video platforms and musicians in Europe, Spain, UK, America and abroad.

SB Thoughts:

:07 becky.gif

:30 ugh, the lack of sci fi knowledge hurts the brain

:45 so she’s for sure a succubus, right?

1:20 because sauce is SO hard to make?

1:28 “do you want some more wine to go with those drugs?”

2:11 “call be Beccubus”

2:28 “ya, fuck shirts, ya!”

2:34 injections on the first date, scandalous!!

3:23 i meaaaannnn…

3:50 just what the world needs, more sexualization of murder

Lesson: Just in case you needed a reminder Tinder is still a bad idea.

Rating: 2 out of 5 stars ✩✩

LOUD

Description: LOUD is a short horror film produced for Halloween. It follows a serial killer as he chases down his 16th victim and stumbles upon another.

Ossuary 2 – Turn by Kevin MacLeod is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution license.

Created and Directed by Benjamin West.

Disclaimer: content may upset some viewers.

SB Thoughts:

:16 “♬ I’M TOO BUSY ♩- ♩ENJOYIN LIFE, ♬ SKIPPY-SKIPSKIP ♩ PLAID SHIRT ♩ SKIP ♬”

:37 “hey lady, I just did parkour out here, let me inside. These genes deserve to live.”

:39 oh the irony of killing in that mask

:45 steal this scene idea from HUSH some more

:59 IT’S LITERALLY THE SAME. this is some copyright infringement bullshit.

1:03 “‘♬STILL ♩ JUST ♩ IN HERE, ♬ ENJOYIN’ ♩ MY LIFE ♬'”

1:06 “okay that’s enough, even I’m annoyed of my music”

1:16 I hate to be that person, but with a window like this and no screen or any way to stop an intruder — you’re kind of asking for it.

1:24 “♬LISTENIN’ TO BIRDS,♩ IN MY EARS.♬ I’M SURE NO ONE’S ♩ BROKEN ♩ IN MY HOUSE ♬”

1:46 “actually, cucumber sounds really good right now”

1:55 “WHO’S THE WISE GUY WHO BLOODY’D MY CUCUMBER??”

2:02 sneeze scream?

2:03 is this about to be sex??

2:10 the pillow is mightier than the knife

pillowknife.jpg

2:24 :kneels down: “‘I’m sorry, did you just say, “WHAT are you doing this?” THAT’S JUST BAD GRAMMAR.'”

2:31 is this sex now? I only had abstinence-only sex education

2:46 “just like God” ?? I don’t think that’s right.

3:02 is he just smelling it?? CAN THIS BE OVER NOW?

Lesson: I’m as good at Microsoft Paint as this short was bad.

Rating: 1 out of 5 stars ✩